So for the last year I’ve spent a lot of time critiquing myself and my surroundings. From my friends, how I ate, when I slept, where I lived, what I drove, my hairstyle. I carefully began to pay attention to everything around me and started eliminating whatever wasn’t making me happy. Going over every detail of my life and what I needed to improve on. Shedding all of the old ways and becoming more of myself. I had to learn to appreciate Tonia. The girl without the labels. I had to learn to become comfortable with me.
A long time ago I used to wear nothing but sweatpants and huge t-shirts. I was comfortable dressed that way. I am not talking about the cute fitted sweats. I mean the baggy ones that were two sizes too big and the t-shirts that could fit a person twice my size. I had a very low image of myself.
One day a very good friend of mine asked me why I dressed that way, and I told her I was comfortable. She replied you can be comfortable and cute. It took me almost nine years to figure out what was cute to me. Nine years is a very long time to decide you wanted to change something you weren’t happy with. I went through so many phases and I appreciate each of them, because they all got me one step closer. Closer to happiness.
Remember that post I did where I said I was always behind on everything. Well I am not just behind on the latest trend; I am also behind on doing what’s best for me. I am behind on doing it because it makes me happy and not because someone else told me to.
Now that I am finally making changes I can see the difference in my attitude, how I talk, how I approach people. My entire outlook on life has changed. Not because I changed my wardrobe, but because I decided to be comfortable and happy and cute!